Rough Hands - Alexisonfire“Was I left behind? Someone tell me, tell me I survived. Don’t look so surprised that I’m home, but just for tonight. With rough hands and sore eyes, so don’t speak tonight, I am tired. Let’s just live through this lie. She says I swear too much, she says a lot of things. Well I’d swear every other word if I could, for her I’ll make and attempt. Sometimes love isn’t about how much someone suits you, but how much you’re willing to change to suit them.”
i’m usually like yay i love being alone but i never can really be. i could never be that cat lady because of my fear of the dark and ghosts, i mean it could go away by the time i’m old but i’m 18 now and it’s worse than when i was a kid. man oh man i need to date someone just so i don’t spend the nights shaking in fear or maybe i should just try be friends with people. i need someone to stay with me when my parents go away in a few weeks and i don’t know who to ask because i cut my closest friends out of my life and the friends i’ve kept went and moved away god dammit hmm
idk if i’ll be able to sleep tonight again but i’m going to clean my room and make everything organised because that makes me feel better and it could help a bit but idk i’m probably going to watch movies agaaaaain
i’m so tried. being scared of the dark is such a problem. i barely slept last night, i just watched movies until i couldn’t keep my eyes open and left my fairy lights on. i’m 18, i feel like i should be able to just go to sleep but knowing we have ghosts in the house just freaks me out so much. what does a panic attack feel like?